As if the pressures are not enough, several teens of this generation have to go through the added pressure of adjusting to a new family. Divorced or single parents need to remember that managing adolescence is difficult enough, with all the changes that teens have to face, and facilitating a smooth transition for the kids to a stepfamily is as important as finding the right life partner.
Here are some helpful reminders to ensure that your teen is prepared to enter to and accept a new family, and do not engage in escape vices like drug, tobacco or alcohol abuse.
1. Introduce your child only to partners you are seriously going out with. Do not introduce him to every person you date or consider dating. Exposing your child to every casual date may give him the impression that the relationships you go into are not really serious. He may also feel the trauma of separation every time your relationships don’t work, and unlike you, your child may not be matured enough to understand and accept this reality.
2. Introduce your child to your new partner slowly. Surprises are only good for birthday parties. Sure, your child may – or may not — be happy that you have found a new love, but do not take risks when it comes to your child and your new relationships. Take it slowly. Let them adjust and do not coerce them into accepting your new partner immediately.
3. Include your child in marriage and wedding plans. When the idea of marriage is already being discussed, make sure that your child is into the plans. Learning it from others would give him the impression that you have a ‘new family’ and that he is only part of the old one. Make sure he knows that you are expanding your family and that he is very much a part of it by allowing him to share his concerns. However, do not also force him to discuss things beyond his comfort level.
Tags: stepfamily, teen drug abuse, teen pressure